Archive for August 23rd, 2010

The Moxland Zoo

Over the weekend, Spawn came up with a new plan for the composition of our household:  we need to add another animal. 

The kid is a lot like me, at least in this way, because I was always the kid who loved animals of any sort.  In the basement of my grandparents’ home, in my grandfather’s workshop, there hung a birdcage from the rafters.  My father remembers my grandmother always having a canary in the house, though I suppose that by the time I came along my grandmother’s bird days were over.  I wanted that birdcage, badly.   When my grandfather passed away and my grandmother went to live with my aunt, they auctioned off the contents of the house.  I got my grandfather’s boyhood ice skates (ca. 1910) and my dad came home with the regulator clock that hung in the workshop.  I never got the birdcage, though it’s likely that I never gave voice to my wish. 

I’d still like to have a bird, but having cats in the house like we do, it would be a daily loop of Sylvester and Tweety. 

Spawn’s grand plan for the newest addition to our zoo is to get a gerbil. 

We did some research over the weekend and settled on the gerbil because I flat out refuse to buy a mouse or a rat when the whole reason we have cats is to keep mice and rats out of the house in the first place.  I also nixed the idea of a hamster because they’re more active at night and my theory is, if it’s midnight, everyone in the house needs to be asleep and not gnawing and scratching and running around in little circles. 

Do I want to add another animal to the menagerie?  No.  But Spawn is a persistent little cuss, practiced in the art of wearing a body down.  My only defense is a good offense. 

The plan, devised by me, is that Spawn is to earn the money to buy the whole shooting match — cage, bedding, food, gerbil.  Not only that, but fully half of all the money that Spawn earns has to be put into savings.  That, I thought, should slow the process down a bit. 

Spawn immediately dumped out the piggy bank and set to rolling coins.  Turns out, the kid had enough coinage to pay for at least the cage, so off to the pet store we went.  We hadn’t been home ten minutes and the kid had the cage out of the box and assembled. 

I outlined the plan to my mother today:  she is not to contribute to this endeavor, beyond her usual paying for good grades.  Everything else has to be earned doing chores. 

Spawn washed both our cars yesterday. 

I honestly don’t know how long this will take, but in the meantime I intend to get some mileage out of the child labor. 

— Mox

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